The Huney Update

Finally found out how to get into this blogger account. Haven't really been on here since Google took over the world and my blogger.

So In progress at the moment are:

6. Have Gumboots! Puddles on the way.
7. Make art out of woman: I have cast some women and taken some pics, but am not at finished process yet.... work in progress
14. Portfolio/ website of my work in progress
17. Finish degree: One of us must die sooner or later.
21. Paid of 1.5 credit cards :D
69. Lost 2 dress sizes.... them um. *ahem... found them again.

Completed!

26. Filed Taxes! Thanks be to the accountant goddess who saved me!
43. Went to Canucks Playoff game!
45. Hazelnut bought me a bathing suit (2 piece) this summer
52. Cooked Supper for B&J at their new Place, with a cindy there too!

Abandoned:

16. Ikea frames got abandoned in the move. I have set them free! Meh. What can you do. I have fewer walls now.

and I'm well... smokin sometimes... occassionally again. a little bit.

We're getting down on the days... and many have started to fall like flies off the list.... but you can't win if you don't play!

#24 ~ Quit Smoking

With the occasional exception (Nat Sherman's are my weakness) I have quit smoking. A special thanks to my asthma for making that happen.

#1 ~ Meet Karmen

Not only have I met Karmen, I've become rather fond of her.... lol. Pictured are hot rebecca, Karmen, Moi & Miranda at the tail end of my bday party. :D

#48 ~ Leave Country by Boat

Huney + Clipper = Seattle and #48 down. I went down a few months ago to Seattle. I met up with a good cuz buddy Joan and what was to be one other cuz buddy which turned out to be one of four! lol. It was a weekend of girley girls and shopping. Sunday morning I ventured out on my own down Broadway and had breakfast by myself and with a great woman named Rochelle I had met the night before.


Rochelle is quick on the draw and had me putting my money where my mouth was pretty damn quick. I make one little comment about getting my eyebrow pierced and the next thing i know she is dragging me out of one shop, around the corner up some dark stairs and into the LAUGHING BUDDHA. I am bonding with her by having JOHN D. shove a sharp piece of metal thru my face... I open my mouth one time and she calls me on it. I love it. We head off to a street fair and takes alot of winking my friends before they notice anything different. ;)

#58 ~ Go to Races & Place Bet

So in a fit of boredom, with the list burning in my mind. Hazelnut and I ventured off to the Hastings Parkway after a great breakfast at one of the best diners in town (everyone should have Dining at Helen's on their lists...) Anyways off we went to the races.. (insert ba dump bump sound effect here) What an experience. We finally found the big red sign that said "IF YOU DON"T KNOW WHAT YOU"RE DOING: COME BET AT THIS COUNTER". True story (it was pretty close) we didn't know the difference between win, show or place or how much was a decent bet, and while I had the handy little pamphlet "how to place a bet" we still needed some bossy guy with a trunkload of stock tips for other big white guys like himself to tell us what we needed. Still not having the foggiest clue what we had done, we ventured outside for seat in which to place our bottoms before we rack in the dough.

It's odd, noone really tells you where you belong at these places. Apparently you have to pay for good seats or make due standing on the pavement or on a broken bench up front. Some gruff and typsy woman at the front made room for me to stand on the fence near the finish line. Hazelnut screamed her head off. She's awesome, we're alike that way. With the lottery, the casino and the races, we always truly expect to win. :D After breaking even on the first race, I got a little cocky and bet it all on one horse,(5 bucks) that could have won, almost won, but didn't, it placed, but I didn't choose that option. We needed "gambling for dummies." But it was fun none the less. Hazelnut lost interest as there were no buttons to push... the 2cent machines at river rock are much more her speed, and yes she did walk away a winner there.

Incidently, I never knew that the races were "family" attractions. Breeding gamblers, what a concept. Makes the bingo orphan a thing of the past, just bring them with you....NOT.

#38 & #87 ~ Good dress and good Birthday

Well ok, it was 6 months ago... but alas it is true. I had both a great dress (that showed off my new tattoo...) and a great Birthday. Honestly, it was better than I could have imagined. Hazelnut went all out. It started with a tattoo, and ended with a burlesque show by Cecelia Bravo and Chaz Royale Burlesque. Most pictures have been edited to protect the innocent, or the ones with the camera were too typsy and chopped off heads in each shot.

#12 ~ Get a tattoo

Well I know this task was completed Nov. 26 2005. It was my last act of rebellion of my twenties, compliments of Hazelnut. My godmother did the design, and Justina from Liquid Amber altered it and inked me. I had my brother and my oldest friend Nad there with her baby boy. It was an amazing event. Justina is awesome and totally gifted. It was clean, quick and exactly what I asked for. She was very kind and gentle and patient with my entourage. It was a good, good hurt. For someone afraid of being poked, it was awesome.


I would have posted the pictures sooner, but alas, there were lost somewhere on my cell phone, and only surfaced again this morning thanks to a better card reader.


And yes, I'm addicted.

#18 ~ Jump out of Plane ~ Don't Die

June 11th 2006, This SUPERindianwoman jumped out of a perfectly good plane. Well, as far as I could tell, the plane was actually pretty questionable. {INSERT PIC OF PLANE} And has lived to tell about it.

What started this madness? Me and my big mouth. A friend of mine received a gift certificate as a birthday present, at which point I opened my big mouth and said, “Lucky! I wish I could go with you!” *Ahem, they called my bluff. And if you are reading this you probably know enough about me to know, I had my reputation as one tough broad to protect. And quite frankly I wasn’t scared at all until in got into the questionable plane. But, I will get to that in a second.

So after months of talking about it, a date was set. June 11th, 2006. And I of course tell EVERYONE. Why? ‘Cuz my friends and dearly beloved come in one of two varieties… The first believe I’m insane and beg me not to make yet another radical life threatening decision (example? My eloping), and the second would tease me mercilessly for the rest of my days if I backed out. The second group outnumbers the first in droves. So off I go…

Now for starters I took the floatplane from Victoria to Vancouver on Friday. It was great weather and there were only a few pressure pockets that left my stomach feeling like that last cup of coffee was trying to exit my nose. I did my best to look out the window the whole time at the little houses and cars that looked like lethargic aunts… but alas I could only look for so long as I had a head cold that made my head feel like my sinuses were going to explode. (Insert my new addiction to Tylenol cold and flu here.) While I was up there in the clouds, I pictured myself winging open the door and jumping yelling GERONIMO! And hurdling myself towards the earth… somewhere over Richmond I thought… SHIT! I am about to do that, what the hell am I thinking??? A whole new reason to justify thinking before you speak. If you can’t be a good example, be a horrible warning.

So it occurs to me, I can picture myself falling, and landing, but I cannot picture myself actually jumping. It seems to be the most unnatural thing in the world. Like jumping into a lake not knowing how to swim. Jumping out of a plane not knowing how to fly. Hoping the person you are strapped too, does.

So, we go out for a night to celebrate what could be our last night on earth. I don’t drink (as usual) but wonder if anything I put in my mouth will come out at 10,000 feet. The next morning we head out to Abbotsford. I think we must have some time to get settled, get up the nerve, GET DIRECTIONS on what we are about to do. I assume wrong. We got a quick 5 minute explanation of what we were to expect and what we were supposed to do in the event of an emergency. I lost track of everything the instructor said right about the time he described me sitting on the edge of the plane at 10,000 feet. Seriously, suddenly he sounded like an adult in a Charlie Brown cartoon: “Wanh, Wanh, Wanh, Wanh, Wanh….” I don’t’ know if it was the thunderstorm heading our way, the Backup of people behind us, they didn’t want to give us a chance to get scared, or if they had a complete lack of compassion, but within 20 minutes of stepping out of the car, I’m climbing into a plane with the Aussie Shane who’s hands my life now rests. I’m feeling a little nauseous, but saw three of my friends land safely on the ground. But as the plane shakes off the ground, I think to myself… WHAT THE HELL??? Where’s my asthma inhaler, where’s my mind, haven’t I found Jesus yet? I am the last out of the plane, Hazelnut is the first… suddenly the door opens. OH MY GOD. The plane seriously is a lawnmower in the sky. It was a judgment call, jumping seemed better than landing in it.

We freefall for a minute and I am screaming the entire way… Not the terrified scream I thought I would have… but sheer JOY. I am thrilled, ecstatic, HOOKED. I found out the day before that they treat asthma attacks with adrenaline… Looks like I won’t have one for a week. The world is hurdling towards me and I didn’t’ want it to stop. The shoot opens…. I am thinking of my daughter… she asked me to think of her, ‘cuz she wants to fly…. I think of her. I think of my son. I think of how less fulfilled I would be in life had I not had them, not done this. Shane asks me how that felt…. Jumping. First I felt solid in the plane, and then not…. Just like liquid. He asks how my stomach is… “Solid” I say… so he says ok, we’re gonna feel some g force and then weightlessness. We do. We spin at some outrageous rate and then up… pause… no weight and down. When we land…. I vibrate for hours…. I can’t believe I did that! Can’t wait to do it again! I do eventually kiss the ground… and we make plans to do this annually.

Scratch # 18 off my list of things to do. Jump out of plane, don’t die. Check!
I am superindianwoman… no cape! What provokes me to do these things? Who knows... Perhaps it’s in my genes, perhaps it is fear, Perhaps it’s a result of my upbringing… Regardless of why, I still endeavor too do the impossible, the outrageous, the ridiculous. Midlife crisis? Hardly I plan on living a long, long time. Not at halfway yet. I just want as few regrets as I can from here on out. Handgliding should be a cinch....
!M.

PS, A Special Thanks to Juicy Fruit and Stands with Juice for starting this whole madness, would not have done it without you. Stands with Juice, let's see if you can jump with juice.

Honey's Progress April 26 2006

#13 - Motorcycle



Ok, in this regard I think I have made progress. I haven't exactly taken a motocycle class or even gone for a ride, BUT I have sat on a Honda Rebel 650... the newer models have tapered the seat and lowered it. My feet firmly on the ground purring that there were no carseats behind me. Prrrr. I also have a motorcycle jacket on hold at the mall. Sure, it's kinda like buying a turquoise pair of snakeskin boots with nothing to wear it with.... YET. You buy the shoes to make the outfit, not the outfit to make the shoes. So i have the jacket before the bike. I'm a wannabe poser. I'm ok with that.

# 35- Get an Agent

Again, I have not accomplished this task, but I have auditioned for some part in something and have posed for pics (sure, I should have been doing my homework, but hey, it was a good hair moment, had to be done.) I have looked at getting an agent in Victoria, I think I could do it.... just don't know if it would be worth it.

Well that's a start... I'll let you know about my adventures with bootcamp and puddle jumping shortly ;)

~Honey

Calling all sweets!

Ok, I have a sweets name Hazelnut, and Stands with Juice has a sweetie named Juicy Fruit. Who BOTH agreed to do this list thingy with us... and yet... I'm not seeing the group effort here sweeties. I thinks Stands with Juice and I are both holding up the blogging end of this thing.

*Insert Guilt Trip here* (she says trying to be cute.... ;)

#80 - Vote

To Vote or Not to vote... that's the NDN question.

Well I know some skins don't think we should do it. Now, I can be as resistant as the next militant NDN. I respect that for some, it is an act of resistance NOT to vote. But, I ain't that girl. I am of the mind that if I have to sit at a table with someone I don't like, I'd atleast like the opportunity to influence who that schmuck might be. So hence... I checked the ballot. Not as a vote of confidence for someone or some party, but a vote against. If I can cancel out some reformer/conservative/homophobic/bigot's vote, then atleast I can do my best to piss of the radical right.

What I did find disturbing, is that my polling station is in a church (pictured above.) What the hell??? That just don't sound like a unbiaised location to me....

#48 - Leave Country by Car (1/3 parts)

Welcome to America...

So #48 down.... Stands with Juice, Hazelnut and I headed South of the Border Saturday morning (into the land of cheap smokes and fatty foods.)

(We were almost lucky enough to have the company of perfect girl... but we wore her out the night before.) We went to Seattle with the intention of meeting the lesbian contestant from "America's next top Model" and boy did we ever. (Hazelnut... what I WON'T do to make u're birthday wishes come true!)... I must say, she has a striking resemblance to Stands with Juice... Sorry about your luck Hazelnut....